by our Guest Writer, the "Cheap Senior Citizen."
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Today's Senior Citizen must be computer savvy. He or she must have a few email accounts, a twitter and facebook profile, maybe a Linked In account and, although this scares us to the very core, we must at least try to do online banking. But before you can do any of those, you have to learn the lingo. This exciting period in technology history has entered a whole new set of terms into our dictionaries, which we no longer have in book form since we have dictionaries online now, but if we did have a dictionary made of paper, it would include the following new terms.
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You will find, as I did with much surprise, that today's computer terms are peculiarly common among Senior Citizens. And because I'm an outstanding leader in this age of computers and this age group in general, I have defined the terms for those of you who haven't quite grasped them yet.
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Windows: What old geezers look out of in the Winter to see if their Social Security check has arrived.
Windows7: How many times old geezers look out in the Winter to see if their Social Security check has arrived.
Screen: What old geezers look out of in the Summer to see if their Social Security check has arrived.
Byte: Catchin' dinner when the Social Security check hasn't arrived.
Modem: What you do in the hay fields to get extra fiber even when the Social Security check has arrived.
Log-On: What you do to the fire to get heat when your Social Security check hasn't arrived.
Down-Load: Getting the firewood off the truck. [Download-er isn't a real term, but it is getting the firewood off the ground where you dropped it.]
Megahertz: When you're not careful getting the firewood, such as when the firewood downloaded on your toe.
Floppy Disk: What you get from trying to download too much firewood. [A Non Floppy Disk is what you go to the chiropractor for.]
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Today's Senior Citizen must be computer savvy. He or she must have a few email accounts, a twitter and facebook profile, maybe a Linked In account and, although this scares us to the very core, we must at least try to do online banking. But before you can do any of those, you have to learn the lingo. This exciting period in technology history has entered a whole new set of terms into our dictionaries, which we no longer have in book form since we have dictionaries online now, but if we did have a dictionary made of paper, it would include the following new terms.
-
You will find, as I did with much surprise, that today's computer terms are peculiarly common among Senior Citizens. And because I'm an outstanding leader in this age of computers and this age group in general, I have defined the terms for those of you who haven't quite grasped them yet.
-
Windows: What old geezers look out of in the Winter to see if their Social Security check has arrived.
Windows7: How many times old geezers look out in the Winter to see if their Social Security check has arrived.
Screen: What old geezers look out of in the Summer to see if their Social Security check has arrived.
Byte: Catchin' dinner when the Social Security check hasn't arrived.
Modem: What you do in the hay fields to get extra fiber even when the Social Security check has arrived.
Log-On: What you do to the fire to get heat when your Social Security check hasn't arrived.
Down-Load: Getting the firewood off the truck. [Download-er isn't a real term, but it is getting the firewood off the ground where you dropped it.]
Megahertz: When you're not careful getting the firewood, such as when the firewood downloaded on your toe.
Floppy Disk: What you get from trying to download too much firewood. [A Non Floppy Disk is what you go to the chiropractor for.]
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....and one more thing......
uh, I'll get back to you when I remember it.
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The Cheap Senior Citizen is a Guest Writer who occasionally shares helpful hints she has learned through her experience.
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....and one more thing......
uh, I'll get back to you when I remember it.
-
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The Cheap Senior Citizen is a Guest Writer who occasionally shares helpful hints she has learned through her experience.
1 comment:
Ruth you are a nut!!
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